Dialogue and communication

The infallible mirror technique for your children to hear you at once

The infallible mirror technique for your children to hear you at once

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"Elena, get dressed." At 5 minutes. "Elena, get dressed, please." After 10 minutes. "Elena, let you dress!". I spend the day repeating the same things without obtaining any kind of fruit, and it seems that today's children - it is something that all the mothers of the park agree on - do not do well with listening and paying attention . Of course, from today everything will change, with the infallible mirror technique for your children to listen to you. Your life will never be the same again, promised!

It is not a matter of looking for culprits but of finding solutions, but it must be recognized that many times it is parents who do not know how to communicate with our children and who make the mistake of giving that order or instruction wrong. What things do we do wrong and can we correct?

- We abuse the screams
If we want to say something to our little one, we must approach him, get at his height (squat down or sit down both in a chair) and then tell him what we need from him. And it is that it has been shown that with screaming we lose the ability to influence others, be they children or older, not to mention the damage we are causing them: low self-esteem, stress, aggressiveness ...

- We give the order from the other end of the house
How are we going to pretend that they pay attention to something if we tell them from a different room where they are? So the only thing that can happen is that they do not hear us, they do not understand well or, simply, that they do not pay attention to what we want to tell them. If the child faces us and looks us in the face, it will be easier for him to hear us!

- We do not control our non-verbal language
We want them to listen to us and not be afraid of us, hence we have to review our non-verbal language. What are we expressing with our face and with our body? Did you know that arms akimbo and legs half open help to express determination and firmness?

And once we know what is not working and we have corrected these little things that were interfering with our communication, it is time to learn how to give an order or an instruction. To ensure that our request is not going to fall on deaf ears, we will resort to the mirror technique.This method consists of standing in front of the mirror in the bathroom or in our room and rehearsing how to give an order so that it is more effective on the other person. Shall we start with the practices?

- Yes it is true that our tone of voice has to be a little higher than the one we use normally, but we must not overdo it, that is, we must banish the screams.

- What we have to say, we will say it speaking a little slower than normal. On the one hand, we will transmit calmness to the child and not anger and, on the other hand, he will get the message without any problem.

- The speech has to be clear and direct. Nothing to beat around the bush or try to justify ourselves. If you can, don't overdo it for more than a minute. In addition, it is important that during it you take a mini pause to see if the child is following your conversation.

- Within what we have to communicate, we will not mix more than one idea. For example, if we say "Put away your toys, pick up clothes, do your homework ...", in the end the child will go crazy and will not do anything as requested.

- If you notice that the little one has not gotten your message, Repeat it!

- Strengthen your attitude. During the process it is important to reinforce their behavior with positive phrases. "How well you are doing" or "I'm very proud of you" will make her feel better. And, if it comes out, don't hesitate to give him a hug or a kiss at the end.

- By last, Do not give another order or instruction until you are done with this activity!

Now that you know the guidelines to follow and that you have practiced two or three times in front of your mirror, it's time to take action! You already have all the tools, you can no longer fail!

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